The G-Boys and the HHTFTBT
by PWARBA
Summary: When Duo loses his hairbrush, it seems the world will end. But That is only the beginning as a clump of his hair acquires life. How will the G-Boys get out of this one?


Title: The G-Boys and the Horrible Hair Monster From The Bath Tub  
Rating: Pg for language, those darn potty mouths...  
Disclaimer: If I owned the G-boys, I would not let anyone know for fear of rampaging fan girls. Let the people who do own them deal with that.  
AN: They are for the most part somewhat out of character. Silliness and stupid humor to follow this message. Do you accept your mission to read this story and review it? Mission: Accepted.  
  
  
Duo stepped from the bathtub, wringing out his long chestnut hair. He wrapped a towel around his waist and searched for his brush. After nearly tearing apart the bathroom, he let out a distressed wail. Trowa ran to investigate, figuring the pilot may have been captured again. Duo's cry of anguish rang through the house and by the time Trowa approached the door, everyone else was on their way.  
"Duo!" Trowa flung open the door, expecting to see an army of soldiers, but being met with the sight of Duo's hunched and shuddering figure. "Duo, what the hell-"  
"I can't find my hairbrush!" Duo screeched in torturous sorrow. "I looked everywhere, but I can't find it!" By this time, everyone else had gotten to the bathroom and was peering in past Trowa's tall figure. Duo stood on shaky feet to lean on Trowa's shoulder and mourned the loss of his hair brush.  
"Feh," Wufei huffed, "Just get a new hairbrush."  
"You don't understand! I can't just replace my hairbrush, and besides," he sniffed, "I can't go out there with out my braid in."  
"Oh for crying out loud, which you can stop now," Heero added with unusual kindness, "you can use my hair brush to put in your stupid braid."  
"Oh Heero!" Duo's eyes began watering again, "You're so noble!"   
"Hn." The only response he afforded the long haired, and towel clad, pilot as he tossed him the brush from the bedside table.  
Duo caught the brush and held it close in a tender hug. He thanked Heero again and began the vigorous task of brushing through his waist length hair. He hummed to a song he had heard on the radio and the other pilots wandered back to what they were doing. Except for Quatre who had to be dragged away by his pink shirt collar.   
Duo tied the end of his braid and tossed it over his shoulder. Looking at Heero's brush, he noticed quite a few long hairs tangles in the teeth. Deciding to do Heero a favor, he picked each and every one of those hairs out and wadded them into a fuzzy ball. He tossed it over his shoulder towards the trash can, but missed and it dropped into the bathtub.   
"Damn," he cursed as he bent to retrieve it from the drain. But the wad of hair had joined the other many hairs left from his shower. The fuzzy jumble of strands seemed to writhe away from Duo's hand. Duo let out and frustrated grunt and grabbed at the lump of fuzz. The squishy mass dodged his advances yet again, and by this time, Duo was a bit irked.   
Just as he was about to call out to the other pilots, the hairy lump launched itself from the drain and landed on Duo's face.   
"Hanfo hesha," his muffled words were unheard. Duo slapped his hand over the creature and ripped it off his face long enough to cry for help. Or close to it anyway.  
"GET THIS THING THE HELL OFFA ME!"   
At this outburst all the gundam pilots once again raced to the bathroom, Quatre leading the pack.  
"Duo, what is it?" Quatre yelled as he stopped in his tracks to stare in shock at Duo trying valiantly to fend off the attacking fuzzy ball.  
"It's a horrible hair monster from the bathtub!" Duo yelled back. He summoned all his strength to toss the creature to the ground. "Kill it! Kill It!"  
Duo crawled onto the sink as the pilots all tried stomping on the scurrying hair thing. Suddenly, it shot past their feet and scurried out the door.  
"After it!" Wufei cheered, anticipating a good hunt. Every Gundam pilot ran out after the mass of hair, stopping one at a time to acquire a weapon. Heero tried slicing it to pieces with a small knife, but it scurried up his arm. Heero cried out in a sudden burst of emotion.   
"Agh! It's got me!" He wailed in horror. Trowa grabbed a nearby lighter and tried torching the fuzz ball, but only accomplishing getting attacked by the creature and setting Heero's tank top on fire.   
As Trowa fought off the monstrous beast, Heero rolled around on the ground, trying to smother the flames. Quatre, with the best intentions, waited for the creature to slow down enough so he could strike it with his weapon of choice. It paused and almost seemed to emit a miniscule cough and Quatre stole that moment to swing his sledge hammer with all his might. The small creature leapt from Trowa's face onto Quatre's head.   
Quatre began flailing around the room with Wufei chasing after him, picking at the monster with his chopsticks. Duo watched all this in wonder and deciding his spoon would pose no threat to the enemy, he left to retrieve a more...effective weapon.  
"I'm back," he announced, machine gun in hand. Wufei hand stopped picking at Quatre's head and was chasing it around the floor. Duo took aim and let it rip. The hairy monster scuttled all over the floor until it sought out the safety of Wufei's pants. Duo was still shooting for all he was worth and barely heard Wufei's desperate pleas for him to cease fire. Fortunately, Duo ran out of bullets just as he was at Wufei's feet.   
Wufei was writhing, attempting to remove the beast from his pants. In the process looking very much like an exotic dancer. Heero had stopped the fire that consumed his favorite tank top.  
"This means war. There's only one thing that will stop this monster." With that, he ran out the door as fast as he could run and then some with the urgency of the situation.  
"Figures!" Duo shouted bitterly at this apparent abandonment, "He runs away! COWARD!"  
Wufei managed to somehow dislodge the hairy mass from his pants and has trying once again to smash it under foot. Suddenly, it dashed out the door Heero had left open in his hasty retreat.   
"After it!" Quatre and Trowa cheered. The pilots pursued the fuzz to and open meadow. Every suddenly became aware of the ground trembling under their feet.   
"What the hell?" Duo exclaimed just as the top of a gundam could be seen just above the trees. It was wing zero.  
"Heero!" Duo whooped happily, throwing his arms in the air. the fuzzy thing torpedoed itself at the immense machine. Wing Zero swatted at it as though it were a fly. But the creature's size gave it the advantage.   
Wing Zero lashed out at the monster and caught it between two of it's enormous fingers. The miniscule menace was tossed into the air, and as it fell, Wing Zero whipped out it's blaster.   
Wing Zero took aim carefully, then pulled the trigger, obliterating the troublesome nuisance forever.  
Wing Zero powered down and Heero emerged from the cockpit.   
"Mission: Accomplished."  
  
A week later, things had gotten pretty much back to normal. Duo stepped out of the bath tub and looked for the hairbrush he bought yesterday. Unable to locate his new hair brush, he wailed in sorrow.  
"I can't find my hairbrush!"   
Trowa and Quatre were watching television and heard his distressed call. They arrived at the bathroom door and saw Duo once again huddled in a ball, crying over his hairbrush. Duo looked up, teary eyed, and suddenly stopped.   
"Oh wait! There it is!" he snatched at his brush which had fallen beside the toilet. " Thanks guys!"  
With that he began to brush his hair out in preparation for braiding. Trowa and Quatre returned to their show. Duo finished braiding his hair and he cleaned out the teeth of his new hairbrush.  
"A clean hairbrush is a happy hairbrush," he smiled and tossed it towards the trash can. He missed and it landed in the bathtub.   
He rushed over and peered over the edge of the bathtub. His hair began to meld together.  
"Oh no! Not again!" he groaned and snatched the muddle of hair before it had a chance to acquire life. He tossed it into the toilet and flushed it down. Relieved, he shut the left the bathroom and shut the door behind him.  
Little did he know that in the pipes under the house, a fuzzy little ball began wiggling it's way out of the toilet...  
  
  
Done! Finally! I had a sudden burst of inspiration and had to write it out.   
  



End file.
